Dead ass.

I have two big fears when it comes to relationships:

1. I will find someone who I think is perfect, and end up getting played.

OR

2. I will find someone perfect, but due to my inability to SEE she's perfect at the time, I let her go, only to realize how perfect she really was far too late.

Now, the confusing part of my life now is that either one of these two things can happen, depending on what I end up doing. Doing one thing seems naive, and doing the other seems paranoid. Doing one thing seems jaded, and doing the other seems overanxious.

I think what will come into play here is my ability to make the best out of a bad situation. Even if I were to "lose" and get played, I can still learn from it, making things clearer for the next time around. However, if I end up in the second situation, all I will be able to do is reflect on the past, unable to move forward at all.

I said she was different for a reason, and I meant it. While some signs point to half-ass reasons to leave her alone, most signs show that she is the kind of girl I know I want.

Maybe I'll win, maybe I'll lose...

Nah, losing isn't an option.